Amber & Truth

Amber & Siren's Song

What does it mean that my iDevice woke me up to this song for the third time in recent memory?



It must mean something.  It seems really inappropriate for a wake up song, even though I do love those Timbaland beats.

Amber & My Gift

So, today is a super big day for me for two reasons.

First, I got a chiropractic jaw adjustment, my first ever.  Dr. Cooper is a miracle worker.

He started off my massaging the inside of my mouth which was not very enjoyable.  And then he did that scary magic thing with the cracking sound.  And now my jaw is in a different place; I am actually biting my tongue a bit and have a lisp, which the doc says will get better as I adjust to the correct position.  He said it moved a whole centimeter.  Crazy stuff.  And, now I am wicked sleepy, likely from the release of all of the tension.  Maybe tonight, I can sleep through dawn?

The second big thing today, maybe even bigger than my jaw miracle, is that maybe I will get my big dancing break tonight.  I mentioned to my chiropractor that I was planning to go see Nick's sister dance tonight.  (Also, I asked to leave postcards in his waiting area.  Seriously, it sounds wonderful and you should go.  It's about the Forest, which is very timely for me--stay tuned.)  Dr. Cooper asked what I had been doing to prepare in the event they asked me to join them on stage.  Why, I have been born to dance, as readers of this blog know.

But, even those with natural gifts sometimes need to use them lest we lose them.  To this end, I have spent the week watching Shakira videos.



See?  Anything I want, anything in the whole wide world.  And what I want?  Is to share my gift.

I only hope the world is ready.  I fear the crowd might yell, "Give us Barabbas!"  And then my dance would be silenced.  Not to use too heavy of a metaphor.  Or to bring to mind my favorite summer reading.

More than anything else in the world the Procurator hated the smell of attar of roses.

Amber & Munks

This has been me with work this week.

You can see my allegorical self here, in larger form and therefore larger nut.

Amber & One Man's Junk

Why on earth would someone be throwing away Art? You can't see in this photo, but at the bottom it is entitled "Garden of Eden." Amazing.

Amber & Desire

Sigmund's astral body chuckled with contentment yesterday as I learned an important lesson about the nature of desire.  It all started with an afternoon sweet treat craving and an ad for a Frappuccino on a cup holder that I played with on my desk during a conference call.

Now, it's no secret that I have long been a fan of Starbucks's product, highly-available coffee.  Given my love for the brewed bean purveyor, you might be surprised to learn that I had never tried a Frappuccino.  They just seemed so expensive (I get the misto although I really prefer a cappuccino mostly because it costs about a dollar less) and more like a dessert than a beverage, really.  I've had the ice coffee, of course, and the weird Vivanno blended smoothie drink, too. But, until yesterday afternoon when I succumbed to my yearning, I had never had the Frappuccino.

Well, desire sure is the yearning for a fundamentally lost object, Sigmund.  I'd even go a step further and say it's a yearning for something that one cannot have, that may never have existed.  The Frappuccino?  Crappuccino, people.  Not only wasn't it as good as it was in my imagination, but it was just plain pukey.  It didn't taste anything like coffee, was way, way too sweet, and had a certain waxy thickness about its texture that seemed highly unnatural.  Gross, gross, gross.

Some things we think we want, with all our hearts, are only wanted because they can't be had.  Some things look like delicious sweet treats and we might fantasize about them as afternoon snacks, but in reality those frozen coffee drinks might have been serial womanizers who have horrible, violent tempers who are are registered Republicans.

Ah, desire.  First it's red and then it's blue.  And every time I see a Frappuccino, it reminds me of you.

What flower expresses the kisses, the kisses?

Amber & Don't Read Too Much Into It

Last night, I had a dream that I went to See John Cleese who was busking in Washington Square Park.

He recognized me from an episode of Murder She Wrote and came over to talk to me.  I told him my hobby was my desktop rock garden.

He said he thought that was a boring hobby with no future and should take up the cymbals.

I thought that was good idea, but was worried about where I would practice since Sake Hausman was sleeping.

And then this guy was there.

And then I woke up.  Or did I?

Amber & The Morning Funnies

Ha!  Those zany physicist jokes.  Get it?

Me neither, but it has dueling cats!

Amber & Awesomeness

Sigourney Weaver, cats, lasers, and intertextuality run amok.

Amber & Sure Things

Today is world-famous blogger CRD's birthday. I am so honored to count such a famous journalist and proficient epicurean amongst the joys in my life.

Some little known facts about CRD in honor of his birthday? Sure. For starters, he was born on this day in the wilds of Africa and raised by a pack of elephants.

As a result, he often prefers to roam the desert shirtless, like his in situ family.


Sometimes, his naked elephant nature leads to naked bicycling while painted to remind himself of the African sky.Luckily, for us, Nick found CRD and brought him back to Barcelona civilization with him and his cousins, Kathleen and Grant.


From there, CRD went to London where he got a job as one of those guys who guards the palace, but it didn't last long since he always forgot to wear his uniform.
Nick then talked to his friend Matthew who got CRD a job at The New York Review of Books. Here we are in his cubicle on the day we met!

Some of his positive attributes include, but are not limited to, coming to visit you even when you live in the most godforesaken places.

Listening good when you are telling stories about your cats puking or boring work stuff that makes you angry.
He's a swell friend, as fine a specimen as anyone could ever want, and I love him.


I looooooove you (blink), CRD.

Amber & The Perfect Blendship

Hippo:Monkey::CRD:Amber

This work of Paul Frank fine art is so perfect and fitting for my friendship with CRD-- not only because he loves hippos (alot) like I love primates, or because we both blog about and know how to ride bikes. It also sums up our friendship, if smiling and riding a bike can be read as an allegory for sitting on the couch watching programs. It's also symbolic of how two seemingly different things can have so much in common: I am a monkey, CRD is big and red, but we both pedal along. The one unrealistic thing about this portrait of our friendship is that I, the monkey, am not wearing a helmet. Everyone knows I always wear a helmet, and even sometimes wear specialty headwear around the office.

You know what other two things have a special bond where each is made better by their friendship? Pickles and fleece blankets.

He's not hiding from the vacuum. I was resting, trying to horizontal off my horrible headache, and he nuzzled and suckled his way into the middle of the blankets. You can't tell from this photo, but he is purring so loudly that you can feel his purrs vibrating in the bed frame.

OMG. I love that buddy.

Amber & Outward Bound

You know those programs where you take a bunch of "at risk" youth and make them hike in the wilderness? And while you are eating beans out of a can and wearing bear bells you learn about nature and the environment while also learning about yourself? This morning, the kitties and I had our own woodland version of that, and I discovered things about my true nature... and about the quintessences of the kittens.

For example, I learned that Pickles is really a rabbit. His preferred mode of transit in the brush is hopping and bounding.


Of course, this means that wherever he goes he travels exceedingly quickly which often leads to crashing into tree trunks or bounding off the side of hills slippery with fallen wet leaves.

I also learned that his brother, Ginger, is really a prairie dog. Whenever nature makes a noise-- a falling branch, a bird fluttering past, an angry chipmunk, Gigi sits up and listens with his front paws dangling in the air.


And the thing that I learned about me is that when there is an event to photodocument, I will usually leave my camera back in the house.

Amber & The Unexpected

It's kind of damp and foggy this morning. Although the door is open, Woody, Ginger and Tiggy all prefer to be inside. But not this guy.


Who would have expected that the one cat who was so terrified in the car that he pooped and peed himself would be the one to explore the deck this morning? His new name is Pickles the Brave.

Amber & Weather Patterns

I have this theory of weather that I learned from a friend. "Tomorrow will be basically like today but maybe a little hotter or colder and a little sunnier or rainier." This summer, that theory has failed me in a big way. Many a day have I been caught bare-toed in freezy breezes, or besweatered in sweltering sun. But, imagine the comfort I felt when I checked the 10-day forecast today and proved my theory to be true.





Tomorrow will be basically like today, but maybe a little more T-Stormy or Scattered.

Amber & Friendship

Over at Internals Plural, CRD posted this examination of the nature of interspecies friendship. Amongst the examples was this photo which is, in fact, an allegory of my friendship with Diana, wherein our parts are played by our respective animal obsessions.

Only, Diana and I have different interpretations of the moral. Diana thinks this is an allegory about how she likes to sniff hedgie me. I think it's about how I am sickie (see my little cast?), and Squirrel Diana comes to give me her well wishes in the form of a little woodland kissy.

(Photo of Diana and Peter by Jimmy)

Thanks, Diana, for being my squirrel friend.