Amber & Juicy, Alright

So, Juicy Couture is the latest high-profile Fifth Avenue tourist shopping destination to be invaded by bed bugs.  And our friends over at Racked had this amazing photographic evidence.

There's a joke there about how bedbugs suck blood and it says JUICY on the butt of those annoying sweatpants, but I am too busy being smug about the whole thing to articulate it.

Also, here is an informative video about bed bugs and their reproductive cycle that kept me awake for at least one night.

I don't know which would be worse: having bed bugs or having to wear those awful fuzzy track pants.

Amber & Pants Head

Can you help me understand this?

My fellow commuter seems to be wearing a pair of leather shorts on his head.  You can't tell from the angle I had to use to be covert, but there are actually two "legs" of hair on the top of his head.  Now, I want to be very clear: I am not mocking.  I was actually fascinated and a little confused.  Are they really shorts?  Is this a known hair thing?  Doesn't it make the top of your head hot like the time CRD wore his leather pants to my Tropical Holiday Party in 1996?

As someone who often has Bad Hair Days, I really respect the creativity of this gentleman.

Would that I had pants for my head!

Also?  He was reading The Atlantic.

Amber & Tomanoocheese

Today is the kind of day where you just need alot of comfort stuff: it's cold and gray outside, and there seems to just be alot of stress in the air.   This might be the kind of day for which Jesus Air Spray was created.  But it is definitely the kind of day for which Grandma Louise invented Tomanoocheese.

Tomanoocheese is Campbell's Tomato Soup, any kind of noodle (by which I mean pasta), and melty molten chunks of orange cheddar cheese.  (See how clever I was at naming things when I was six?  Get it?  Toma-noo-cheese!)  And to me and my belly, it is THE comfort food.

Also, my belly is trying out a new kind of comfort today, the belly band.  These devices, available for sale on my BFF Etsy, are circular strips of stretchy fabric you wear around your middle under a shirt and over the top of your pants.  They are originally intended for pregnant ladies to help keep their bellies covered and warm when the babies inside make them expand and their shirts rise up.  Only, I figured they could offer the same service for non-pregnant ladies with bellies that expand, well, because of Tomanoocheese.

I got mine in purple, and I happen to be wearing a purple shirt, so it might be kind of hard to see in the photo.  But, I can assure you that it's great.  It's like a belly cozy.  Take that, too-low-riding-pants matched with too-short-shirts!

And take that and that, cold gray sad day!

Amber & Self-Avatar-It

I know what I look like. But, I can't seem to make an avatar that looks like me. CRD made this one of the two of us in the style of that show all the kids love these days.  The coffee is the only real give-away that it's me; the body type is 100% me, but the nose is not-quite-exactly-Amber.

I made this one.  I got to pick from lots of different faces and noses and eye shapes.  I still don't think it looks like me.  It has the right hair and bangs, maryjane shoes, brown eyes, and $35 jeans, but it's still not quite right.  It just doesn't look like me.

It sure is hard capturing my essence in pixels.  Maybe because there's no avatar setting to coat yourself in cat fur?

Amber & Perceived Values, Part I

How much do you think a pair of jeans should cost? I am stuck in Gap prices from 1992 when Y.T. Vega got an employee discount and I wore size 4: $35 seems like a reasonable price to pay for jeans to me. Now, I know they cost more. For example, I bought a pair of size 6 jeans at the Patagonia Avalanche sale in 2007 with my professional colleague, Laura (who is a super smart person and currently looking for work if you're hiring). On sale, they were $50, but they were organic cotton so it seemed worth it to me. And, earlier this year, I bought a pair of size 8 jeans at Macy's (who knew that tourist destination had so much stuff for sale?) for $39. They were on sale, though, too, and I had to dig through a giant messy pile to find my size. I felt like that effort was like the discount when you pick your own apples.

But, since, as I approach infinity, I appear to be expanding at a rate exponential to the metric expansion of the universe, I needed new jeans. I am pleased to report the discovery of the Levis website where you can find many different models of jean (505,501, 550, and other three-digit numbers that had no meaning to me as an infrequent jean buyer) on sale for a variety of prices, some of which are $35. Of course, sizing on the web could be an issue, but it worked out well for me. Of course, I may have a hard time convincing Pickles that I just bought myself two $35 pairs of pants rather than one $70 cat environment for him.


This also means, of course, that tomorrow I will wear new jeans that are ALREADY covered in fur. It's like buying the floor model coffee table that comes pre-scratched. You can avoid that awful "first time" moment.

Amber & The Namesake

Peter, whose signature style involves colorful pants, striped shirts and slip on shoes, sends this recon from the street. Peter Loopted it thusly: "It is on 9th and Sixth, next to Citarella's and in the former E.J.'s Luncheonette space."


But the question is: what is it? It could of course sell the named resin itself in jewelry form, but I think it's unlikely that merits an entire retail space. The logo looked like a restaurant to me-- maybe a place that should serve pitas or wraps or smoothies? But hardened tree sap isn't really a very appetizing name for a food establishment.

Turns out, after some research, it's a whole chain of pan-Asian restaurants. Web reviews are mixed, and I am disappointed.

I hate this use of my name. But, maybe it will make people remember me more? Or, maybe it will make them associate me with overpriced raw fish.

Hmpf.

[Apologies to all the Jhumpa Lahiri readers who accidentally Google themselves to this post. It's a good book, though.]

Amber & Out and Abouts

I was out and about today. I had an Alexander Technique Lesson with Hope at Union Square at 11 am, then I picked up a couple of salad items at Whole Foods and went over to CRD's for Suddenly Salad Soiree. Then I found a pair of shorts that have way too many pockets (who carries so much cargo?) but are shorts in my current size (of which I have zero pairs) and at a price point I liked ($18). Then, I went to James and Alisa's to cat sit.

All three kitties seemed great. Simon seemed to think I was there to feed him and did alot of talking near the food dishes.


Alicia was lovey and so I gave her intense rubs. (Don't worry: I carried out the fur that came off.)


Scarlet had attacked and killed a paper towel roll. I am sure James and Alisa are proud to have such a fierce hunter protecting their home while they are away.

Amber & Jimmy Time

Yesterday, I got my bangs trimmed for free, bought a perfectly-sized pair of jeans, went to Murray's Cheese Shop and got malted milk balls, had Laundry Club with CRD, watched a Doris Day movie that made me think I was having LSD flashbacks, and had a really delicious Mexican Brumch with Jimmy.

I took this picture of Jimmy while we were doing errands. He had to hold my coffee so I could press the black button on the camera.


Then, Jimmy took this picture of the two of us. I look sort of droopey, but I think that's from the cold windy weather and incredibly bright sunshine.

Amber & Bonus Content

I took this photo last night of CRD and his nephew, Kitty Zach.

There are a number of remarkable things about this photo, about which I will now remark with numbers.

1. Zach matches CRD's pants super well. It's like it's fate for them to be nephews.

2. Zach is, apparently, very bendy. He is folded in half and doing bicycles with his legs. The thing you can't tell from the photo is that he was purring ferociously because being bent on his nephew CRD's lap is his fave.

3. CRD seems surprised that I am taking the photo, even though he was not. He is method acting, being the surprise.

4. This bonus post is for Kevin who thinks it is odd that CRD and I limit ourselves to one post per day when some days there might be many more things to post about. Like cats.

Amber & Bad Dreams

I had a nightmare last night that I had moved to Baltimore.


I had gotten a job at a library there, but the staff of the library was broken up into teams. On my firs day of work, I discovered that my team was the Deists and we were pitted in a battle of restocking against a rival team called the Transcendents. (I swear to you I took no drugs before going to bed.) I was wearing a skirt that everyone kept pointing out in a disapproving way was made of "pants material," and after I went out to lunch, I couldn't find my way back to the library until I had a policeman escort me. Once I got back, I realized I had lost my giant bag of knitting materials, but then it showed up in the DVD return bin. I called CRD and asked him to find out if my apartment had been rented yet because I wanted to move back.


I woke up all sweaty and tense. My neck is killing me.

Amber & Mahvelous Ladies

I love Bill Cunningham, but I don't actually know who he is. I know he's not this guy, and I know he thinks it's just wonderful how the ladies dress themselves with such individual style and flair.

Every week, he does a report on what he saw the ladies wearing from the prior week. He's always awe struck by their genius, and I get swept up in his enthusiasm. He gets mentioned alot on Gawker, where I also learned that someone tried to identity theft him! And, I also read about this scandal where he dismissed a minion. Apparently, I am not alone in my adoration.

In this week's audio slideshow, he notes how ladies are dealing with the cold weather and wind. He also goes off on a tangent about how "witch" rhymes with something he doesn't want to be mistaken for saying, so he doesn't include a photo of one in case.... well, it doesn't really make sense. But I sure love him!

Amber & Hedgehogs

I love hedgehogs. My Miss Tiggy Winkle



is the namesake of Mrs. Tiggy-Winkle, the most famous washer-woman furze-pig of all times. See the resemblance?

Imagine my surprise when browsing the hedgepig archives on Cute Overload, I discovered that Woody shares my affection for the spiny little buddies? While the Amber is away, the cat and hedgies will play....

And who knew Amy had plaid pajama pants?

Amber & Lonely Boating

I love Wonder Woman. Well, I loved the TV show starring Not-So-Little Ms. Linda Carter when I was Little Amber. CRD and I have recently attempted watching the show again and discovered it was a little dull and not very well acted. But boy could she smile and make granny-panties look hot.

Kevin passes along this news item about the woman behind the wonder. Apparently, Ms. Carter was boating alone and discovered a body on the banks of the Potomac. I wonder: what was this woman doing boating alone? And I wonder: did they then call in Bones and Agent Booth?

Still, she'll always be my hero.

Amber & Kitty PJs

Today is a sad day in the world of pants. The kitty pajama bottoms that have been my loyal bedtime companions have gone to the rag bag in the sky. Taya gave them to me many, many years ago at my bowling birthday party. I bundled their receipt. Taya said she was concerned that I might not like my gift, and I said, "As long as it's not something cat-themed!" And lo! Kitty pajama bottoms which turned out to be a wonderful gift.

(photo from yoga on deck at River House by James)

I've loved them. I loved their cottony softness, their ability to mask kitty fur, and the fact that it says meow on the back pocket. But this morning, I went to pull them up and with my brute strength tore the waist band right off the pants. They already had several holes where my restless leg syndrome had worn them thread-bare, so there's no hope of mending.

God bless, kitty pajamas.

Amber & Sickness

Kevin says it's a sickness. But sometimes a little sickness is a good thing. Like: when you have food poisoning and it clears out the bad things in your system. The food is the bad thing, not the sickness. In this case, the cold weather is the bad thing, not the lusting after the Maniitok Parka.

Patagonia, everyone's favorite do-gooder outdoor outfitter, is having a HUGE sale. They aptly summarize the sheer joy of the discounted goods available by calling it Winterfest. Co-worker Laura and I walked all the way to Georgetown in the freezing weather (and she had no hat or gloves) and got $39 messenger bags that we love.


I also got a pair of $49 organic cotton jeans which were located on the cash register line like some kind of giant point-of-purchase candy bar shaped like pants. Yum!

I highly recommend it.

Amber & Blue Jean Friday

My company has a Dress Code and Personal Appearance clause on the employee handbook which states that it...

... currently maintains a “business casual” dress code. Employee dress and personal appearance should be in keeping with standards of good business taste, and should be consistent with the requirements of an individual employee’s work day. Employees are expected to use their best judgment in choosing business clothing that displays a neat and professional image. Management reserves the right to mandate or change attire expectations.

Despite the need for clarification and refinement of this policy in the past (no tube tops, spaghetti straps or flip flops), the office is a well dressed and net environment--

--Except on Fridays which are designated as Blue Jean Casual days. Whew. Do things cut loose on Fridays around here! No camel-colored wool pants. It's a regular casual fiesta of attire. I worry that it's discriminatory against other colors of jeans, though. And I wonder how blue jeans really do relate to productivity. Like, would I be posting this right now if I were wearing a suit?

Amber & Wool Pants

I love wool pants. I broke out my charcoal wooly pants yesterday during the snowstorm and spent the day appreciating both their warmth and their fashionability. I'm not talking about wool dress pants-- I'm talking about warm, wooly pants that look like they're fresh from the sheep. Donegal Tweed is my favorite.
My awareness of wool pants developed back in the early 90's when Kevin bought a pair of German WWII woolen army pants from Sierra Trading Post. They were great. They had fastens around the ankles and pockets and a button-fly. Kevin loved those pants, although I think they ultimately succumbed to a wool moth invasion. They looked something like these below.

Ahhh, good pant times.

Amber & Layers

This weekend was my first volunteering at Zoo Lights. I am working the registration area, collecting tickets, handing out programs, and answering visitor questions. I love greeting the public and the zoo is very easy for me to be enthusiastic about. But, all of these activities are done outside, so dressing appropriately to stand around for three-and-a-half hours has been challenging!On Saturday, it was incredibly chilly and I wasn't dressed quite warm enough, but last night I got it right. I wore midweight long johns on top and bottom......a pair of nylon pants with a pair of rain pants over them...
...and on top I wore my very cat furry fleece jacket...
...and then my puff coat (featured here with Amy & David, who I did not wear last night)...

...and my rain coat.To finish off my look, I wore my Madisonwisconsin boots and carried a novelty umbrella. (Tthe importance of an umbrella was suggested by Kevin during a consultation before the event.)
I was completely cozy and fashionable!

Amber & Scented Pants

On Sunday at the zoo, Keeper Becky created a really interesting enrichment activity for the gorillas. We took donated clothing (Dockers, polo shirts, a baby fleece hat) and put different extract scents on them (spearmint oil, orange extract, almond extract, and anise oil). Gorillas like different fabrics; they use them for their bedding and also wrap them on their heads or shoulders and "wear" them. Adding scent made the clothing that much more enriching!

Baraka didn't really seem interested in any of the scents, but Kojo seemed quite enamored of the almond scented pants. He wrapped them around his shoulders and walked around sniffing the cuffs.

I like to give my kitties enrichment, too. Usually, their enrichment comes in the form of a box with a sheet in it, or a game of tent on the couch, or exploration of the high-up shelves in the closet. But, maybe kitties would like scented pants?

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