Amber & Special Guest Stars

Yesterday was the day for surprise special guest stars.  First, Taya joined Peter and I for post-acupuncture ramen (short wait this time-- maybe because the temperature wasn't so deathly low, so the weather wasn't as ramen-ready?).  It was really nice to see her--for the second time in a week!--and the ramen were as usual delicious.

I was so into eating my noodles that I neglected to photo-document the festivities.  But she kind of looks like this.

Then, I came home and watched a NCIS on "the other, lesser Hulu."  I like NCIS because it's like Bones but with less guts and more sailors.  Imagine my joy when my Number One Thief Crush, Robert Wagner, made an appearance as the dad of one of the characters whose names I never bother to learn.

How does he still have that awesome hair at 80?  Like a fine wine, that one, I tell you.

Amber & Sponsored Links

You know how in Gmail the sponsored links change depending on the subject of your correspondence? I usually get ads for cat food online or yarn or couch cleaning services.

This is mine today. Can you guess what I was e-mailing about?

That's right. I hurt my neck while blow drying my hair. Damn you, Shane, and your ionic ceramic hair dryer recommendation. I mean, no one hurts themselves blow drying their bangs, so it must be your fault.

I am waiting for Sue from Dr. Cooper's office to call me back.

Amber & Mom Jewels

Thanks, Mom.

Not just for birthing me or introducing me to Beatrix Potter, Paddington Bear, and Ginny, and not just for feeding me (mostly canned tomatoes) for the first 18 years of my life or helping me write letters to Wonder Woman. But also thanks for giving me this pretty necklace.


It's a little glarey in this photo, but it's got three strands of little aqua-colored buttons attached by little aqua beads. It's my favorite necklace and it really dresses up any number of my plain gray and black outfits. Why, it can even make yoga pants dressy enough for the theatre. I get compliments on it all the time.

It also reminds me a bit of something my hero, Dr. Temperance Brennan, would wear. She always has such nice, big pieces of jewelry. Very anthropological.

Something that is also anthropological and also of psychological and phenomenological interest (maybe if I knew what that mean really) is that sometimes my heroes merge. Like when Bones dressed like Wonder Woman for Halloween.

Double the pleasure. Or like when Jessica Fletcher is in a Noel Coward play. Which brings us back to my necklace and my mom. Eagle bites weasel.

Amber & Bodily Displacement

I had quite a health-related morning. First, there was a "sick passenger" on my train. Unlike on Sunday when that meant an "Irish" person puking in the corner, this meant an overdosed junkie murmuring for help. This delayed my journey by quite a bit. Luckily, there is cell phone reception at the bottom of the center staircase on the downtown platform at 59th Street. (I think it's because there is a transit police station at the top of the stairs.) I was able to call and let my chiropractor know I needed to reschedule... half-way through the appointment.


Next, I saw the podiatrist. I learned that, in science, we call a big toe a "great toe" so that it doesn't develop anxiety about its size. The front of my the metatarsal on my great toe has, as I saw on x-rays, a bony ridge thing that developed as a result of the stress put on it from being en pointe. Ballet, although beautiful, is apparently not good for the body long-term. The podiatrist recommended cold compresses to reduce the inflammation around the joint and gave me a shot of nice stuff (herbs and cortizone, I think) to reduce the present acute inflammation. (A shot in the foot sure is weird. They freeze the foot first.) Also, he told me not to wear Earth Shoes. (Go ahead, James; you knew it.) The lower heel puts increased pressure on my metatarsals and the flexed foot could be what is boo-booing my ankle.


Immediately after the podiatrist I saw my Favorite Person Ever, my chiropractor. I had a subluxation on my left shoulder part, but other than that, my legs were even and he thinks we have turned a corner. Of course, he also forgot I had four cats and thought I only had two. Wishful thinking, Dr. Cooper.
This is my body, and it's the only one I've got.

Amber & S.I. Ouch

With motivational help from CRD in the form of a morning song on my voice mail, I am all chiropracted. Dr. Magic described my shoulders as ropey, which explained why they felt tight, and he did the electrical pulsing tingle on them and rubbed them a bit. And, he determined that what I described as "sore butt" was actually a rotated sacroiliac joint.

This is a mysterious part of the body of which I was not aware until this morning. Well, I guess I was aware of it in that it was sore, but I did not know that the pelvis wasn't one whole bone thing.

To remedy this ouch, Dr. Magic, my new hero, stimulated the muscles with ultrasound and then with a vibrating thing that felt like a floor buffer. Then, he made his adjustment. It's pretty sore right now, but in a different way than before and I feel like I can walk with a little less pain.

God bless, chiropracticing.

Amber & Chiropractic Mornings

Good morning, Sunshine! Why I am posting before 8 a.m. in the midst of my week of unemployment? Why am I not sleeping until noon or waking at 10 and then spending an additional two hours petting kitties before I start up the Internet?

Because, dear readers, I have a chiropractic appointment this morning which I had scheduled while I was employed for an early hour (9) without realizing I wouldn't need to get to the office afterward.

I had a good first appointment. I wasn't even sure if my problem (ouch in the shoulder) was something that could be treated by a chiropractor. And, beyond that, I wasn't even sure if chiropractic treatment was bunk. But, my fellow gardener, Ariel (date her!), described her chiropractor as a magic man. And it was pretty amazing. I felt more fluid, less stiff, immediately afterward.

I'm going back today with a bit of a stiff neck and a slight hunching in my left shoulder. I can't wait to see what tricks are in store for me today.

Amber & But Wait, There's LOTS More

I know I was super excited about the two new Boneses just one post ago. But, if I weren't already away for the weekend, I would have a very full schedule!

There's a new Psych about firemen. What could be better? Gus and Sean making pop cultural references from my youth, witty fast-paced banter, and fake psychic MURDER solving? What?

And then, there's a new Burn Notice. This is a show about a former spy trying to figure out who framed him and got him laid off. The thing that makes this show is the voice over where the main character, Michael Westen, explains how spy things are done. It's like a DIY home spy kit. I've learned all kinds of things about making my own cover identity, bomb construction from yogurt in my kitchen, and breaking and entering. Educational. And, in this episode, maybe he will find out that his archnemisis is a Cylon and maybe she's just in his head?

There are probably alot more free Internet Programs (BSG, Lost, 30 Rock, etc.) to tell you about in case you were wondering how to spend your weekend, but I want to go to brunch now. You keep watching.

Amber & Best Bones Ever

I just watched the Best Bones Ever while here in Boston. CRD and I love Bones and think every episode is pretty spectacular, but every now and then there's an episode that's so good, you want to watch it twice. This was the case with the first 2009 episode of "Double Trouble in the Panhandle."


In it, Booth and Bones have to go undercover as circus performers to solve a mysterious MURDER.This epsiode was AWESOME. It was packed with features I love including, but not limited to, Booth, Bones, circus, fake moustaches, undercover, eye patches, and fake Russian accents. We also get some Sweets backstory.

But wait, there's more. By the grace of god, we get ANOTHER new Bones. This one is about ice in its various form: ice fishing, ice hockey, murdered bodies being "iced. It's also a really strong feature but doesn't have eye patches or circus acts and the corpse is a little fleshier than I would prefer. But, there are the usual funny jokes. My favorite line was delivered by Cam when she says, "I like it, just a little too much." I feel the same about these characters.

Amber & The Tailbone's Connected to the Ouch

Apparently, in the Bronx and parts of Washington Heights, we don't believe in salting the sidewalks. So, although yesterday was a slushy wet mess, today, with the temperature dipping well below freezing, the sidewalks are a solid sheet of ice.

The good news is that now my annual fall on ice is out of the way and we can enjoy the rest of the winter season without fear.
The bad news is: oh my aching coccyx.

Amber & Sisterhood of the Traveling Pains

So, remember how I was told that my four-week headache was actually caused by my jaw? And then I went to see the dentist and she sent me to a place that doesn't take insurance and, according to the wife of a fellow gardener, costs no less than $3,500 per visit? And so, remember how I didn't go to that place, but instead went for a massage and made an appointment for an Alexander Technique lesson this coming Friday?

Well, somewhere in there, I made a bad decision. I woke up this morning, and, despite the tons of Ben-Gay and heating pad and hot baths, the left side of my neck, my shoulder and the top of my arm are Level Four Ouchy. I am going to see my primary care doctor again today to ask "WTF, man?" But, maybe my shoulder is unrelated to my jaw? Maybe it's actually just repetitive stress syndrome from opening a door in the freezing cold for 17,000 visitors all weekend?

Ouch. I am broken.

Amber & Weekends

Today is my weekend. I am working tomorrow and Sunday at the Festive Season Plantbuildings Show, and this is my break between last week and the next one. So, I have to cram all of my chores, socializing and relaxation in today.

I'm going to start by getting a Deep Tissue massage at Great Jones Spa. My jaw has been bothersome all week, and now my neck and shoulders are ouchy from hunching up in head pain. I'm going to let someone work out that tension.

Without the tension holding my body together, I might be a mass of jelly afterward when I have lunch with Kevin at Dojo. I used to go to Dojo all the time when I was in college, and this new economy has reset my finances back to 1989, so a soy burger with cheese is just about all I can afford.


Then, I am going to buy dry food, wet food, and litter at Whiskers.


Then, I am going to go visit CRD at his office. He is the publisher of Canadian coloring books, and he promised to have some waiting for me. I hope I can understand how to color in the Canadian lines.

Then, I am going to come home and vacuum and then go to bed.

What a busy weekend!

Amber & Jaws

I confess: I have never seen the terrifying motion picture from the terrifying no. 1 best seller Jaws. I know the basic plot: big hungry shark, Richard Dreyfuss on a boat, somebody gets eaten, he needs a bigger boat, battle! Probably Richard Dreyfuss wins, or maybe he makes peace with the shark and it goes out to sea never to been seen again (until the sequel(s)). Right?

I tend to shy away from animals-gone-awry films, like the one where the sharks get super smart, or the one with Crispin Glover and all the big mice, or the one with the rabid dog. But today, I sort of regret not having seen Jaws-- I might have learned something that I could now apply to the horrific discomfort I am in on account of TMJ.




Apparently, I clench and grind in my sleep. My doctor gave me muscle relaxants to lessen the tension in the joint, but I ran out on Saturday. I woke up this morning and couldn't open my mouth more than a wee bit. I have a dentist appointment tomorrow afternoon, but in the meantime, Tiggy and I will be eating soft foods and doing our exercises to loosen the joint.

Photo by James

Amber & Second Birthdays

Last night, CRD, who was in Germany for my real anniversary of being born, took me to Birthday Fancy Feast at Red Cat. CRD chose the establishment because he likes the color red and he likes cats, and they had fancy red plates on the table when we came in that we never actually ate on. They were part of the decor.

It was sure a yummy meal. We had Lindy cocktails (which were really just Whiskey Smash! by another name but smelled and tasted as sweet) and tomatoes and lambs and couscous and herbed french fries and rocky road bread pudding. It was super fun, and then we watched Bones.

Thank you, CRD. And thanks to the Red Cat.

Amber & Lonely Boating

I love Wonder Woman. Well, I loved the TV show starring Not-So-Little Ms. Linda Carter when I was Little Amber. CRD and I have recently attempted watching the show again and discovered it was a little dull and not very well acted. But boy could she smile and make granny-panties look hot.

Kevin passes along this news item about the woman behind the wonder. Apparently, Ms. Carter was boating alone and discovered a body on the banks of the Potomac. I wonder: what was this woman doing boating alone? And I wonder: did they then call in Bones and Agent Booth?

Still, she'll always be my hero.

Amber & Pulling a Kevin

Kevin has this cool thing about him where he can make his knee pop out of joint. He can't do it on demand, and it's excrutiatingly painful, but still. Way cool.

So this morning, I decided to be way cool just like Kevin. Coming down the steps to the D train, I managed to step wrong and felt my knee sort of scrape against itself. And then I couldn't straighten out my leg. When I got on the train, I laid down on the bench on my side and straightened it out. Fun!

Now, I'm totally pulling a Woody and limping.

I am such a copy cat.

P.S. Note the new feature added today over on the right, TIGGY OF THE WINK. She deserves a little spotlight.

Amber & Marie

Even though it involves standing outside in the cold (and wind!) for three and a half hours, I am enjoying volunteering at Zoo Lights. Last night, my fellow ticket taker was a woman from Midtown East named Marie. She comes down to visit her sister who lives in Maryland and they volunteer for all of the special events at the zoo. She was fun to talk to, energetic, and had just returned from a two week trip volunteering at the Cheetah Conservation Fund's center in Namibia.Marie helped out in the office, helped take care of guard dog puppies and walked through enclosures picking up leftover lunch bones where there were cheetahs dozing. She learned that you just can't bend down-- as long as you are taller than the cheetah, it won't consider you pray. I'm not sure how she stooped to get the bones off the ground without getting eaten, but she didn't have any visible bite marks.

I learned all about CCF in Cheetah Class, but Marie really experienced it first hand. I feel lucky to have met Marie and gotten to take tickets with her last night.

Amber & Gorilla Heads

ALH is running around like crazy, so it's me, Amy, guest-blogging for her again. She worked at the ape house from 7 to 3:30 and now has to wash off the lemur poop in her hair, bundle up, and race back to Zoo Lights from 5 to 8:30. It's a very zoo-y day.

She shouted to me as she rushed into the shower that she learned today about why the older gorillas have such high head-backs. It's called a sagittal crest, and it's where the gorilla's powerful jaw muscles anchor. Older gorillas have more powerful jaws, and there's a part of the skull that sort of expands as they get older to allow for the muscle growth.

Silverbacks, the dominant male gorillas, have the most prominent sagittal crests. It's a secondary sex characteristic meant to impress the lady gorillas. Orang utans and my family, the Bili apes have them too.

Mrrow. Look at the head-back on this babe.

Amber & Baby Jymmy

My office does a nice holiday program with the Salvation Army called Angel Tags where you choose a gift tag with a child's name and age and buy that child an outfit and a toy. I selected Jymmy, who is 6 months old. One of my co-workers picking his tag at the same time as me seemed to be selecting his tag very carefully and explained his criterion was for the child to be the same age as his own child. I said my goal was to pick a child with at least two Y's in his name.

Kevin & Diana helped me pick out the gifts. For the toy, I got Jymmy a cloth book with a high-relief dog face on the front and a cloth bone toy to hide on different pages. For the outfit, I got a long-sleeve thermal onesy with blue stripes and a blue cotton pull-on pant.


I hope Baby Jymmy and his mom like his gifts. I just have to run out to CVS and get a gift bag and some tissue paper and then the gift will be ready to go to its recipient.

Amber & Bones

My favorite program in current rotation this winter is Bones. I love those science-filled forensic procedural shows, but CSI: Pick A City is a bit too prurient for my TV-viewing tastes in its interest in all the lurid details of the corpses. Bones promised to bring the science and great characters and take place right here at the "Jeffersonian Institution" in Washington, DC. The first season was great. As a forensic anthropologist, Dr. Brennan delt with bones. Although there were gruesome murders, the analysis of the bones was, well, as clean as a bone.

Season Two has gotten more juicy. They added a coroner to the cast who now enables them to deal with more fleshy bodies. And, there are scarier serial murder plot lines! But I love Dr. Temperance Brennan and Agent Seeley Booth. And I love all of the squints: Zack and Hodgins and Angela. Why can't there be more clean science and less gore?